To Stop, Or Not To Stop?

It's been weighing on my mind a lot, lately, whether I should give up blogging indefinitely or not. I've realized that my blog is a lot more public that I hoped it would be, especially the moment I accepted Nicholas' invite to join Veritas Online. And ever since the startling revelation from Feera and Tim that everyone has been making speculations that I have a crush on Noreen, I almost pulled the plug on this thing there and then. Still, I decided to keep blogging, just decided to tone down the personal stuff a bit. But sometimes, when I think about it, I'm not sure I want things to be awkward with people because the know about, disagree or hate my personal thoughts and feelings that I do put up here. I'd really hate it if friends like Noreen or anyone else turn into 'Frosty The Snow Bitch' when they find out things that are better left unknown. Frankly said, how unpersonal can a blog be, when I'm using it to talk about what I go through, and the way I see things? Considering that risk, I have come close to either abandoning this thing indefinitely, or changing the site address, and hiding it so that KYUEM-ians I'd rather keep out stop snooping in, keeping only the ones I love, know and trust informed of the changes. Before I used to blog, when I used to be in boarding school where internet connection was as abundant as snow in Malaysia, I used to keep my thoughts in a real life diary. Given some consideration, I'd think that stopping blogging completely and moving back to what I used to do would probably not be such a bad idea.

But I guess in the end, I'd rather not. Keeping things here have so far have merits as well. Where some people can be inconsiderate assholes, and some people can't seem to disagree on my view on life in a polite fashion, there are others who have given me support and advice that I am ever so grateful for. And on the bright side, people who have been leaving less-than friendly comments actually add some spice to my life. I just love retorting at idio- uh, I mean, people who have different opinions than me (gracious smile). So if you hate me, keep your comments coming. If you want to bitch about me behind my back and turn my friends against me, make sure I can't track you down because God forbid if I ever do, I will cut your heart out with the most blunt, solid object I can find, toss it in a blender, hit 'frappe', chop the rest of your body into itty bitty little pieces after pounding on it mercilessly with a sledgehammer, and finish it off with a steamroller. Or maybe I'll keep you alive longer while I kill you in the slowest, most excruciating way humanly possible.

Uh, the red stuff is blood. Not tomato sauce.

Sorry, I'm not usually that graphic. Oh well...
But seriously people, judge me. It's only human for you to do so I don't mind. I can't expect you to agree with me in every thing I do, and I can't expect you all to respect me. No one ever truly does, in the end. We're all too different. But in the end, just be mature about it. I'm addressing to all ye who are above well, twelve. Any child or toddler who happens to stumble across this site is free to backstab me, call me names, etc, etc.

So yeah, guess you'll keep on hearing from me, until the next big crisis comes from this thing and I contemplate shutting down again. In the meantime, I'd like to thank someone who responded to decaffeinated me speaking in the last post. You helped me make up my mind about blogging here, and keeping my job. And she gave me an idea, speaking of which.

All ye Veritas-ians, if your articles don't come in to me, if not before the end of break, on the first day college opens again, there will be a form of punishment. And no, it won't have anything to do with the pretty picture I just drew. I think. Just lock your doors if I happen to appear psychotic or insane at the moment. That side of me has been known to arise from time to time, and the results are never pretty. Self-inflicted wounds are the worst it's done so far, but let's not see if I'm willing to venture into new territory, okay?

Peace offerings, should I be caught in that state, should be made in the form of Starbucks Frappucino.

So booyah y'all. I'm staying. Keep on rockin' guys and have fun! Except for the jerks, I hope something tragically painful happens to you before college opens. (see? I DO have a spot of kindness in me! were I cruel I would have wished something bad to happen to you DURING college, and then you'll miss CLASS! Wouldn't want THAT now would we?)